Dreaming of Haircuts, Green Tea, and Studded Shoes

I dont really have time, energy, or creative fire to keep this blog moving right now. So instead I will just list all the activities that have interested me more than blogging lately.

1. Yoga
2. Going out to Dinner
3. Laughing at My Coworkers
4. Crying over some very dear losses, in my apartment and at work
5. Taking the Stage, The Buried Life, My Life as Liz, RWDC, ABDC
6. Finances (this one may or may not be a lie)
7. Enjoying Doppleganger madness
8. Listening to Contra
9. Awards Shows
10. Making Lists
11. Tea

Street Singing

Do You Ever Feel Self-Conscious When Eating a Banana?.....How about when singing in public? I'm not necessarily talking about the singing in public or speaking in public as in the general fear. Not stage fright. Rather, do you ever feel self-conscious when humming along with your ipod, or singing to your favorite song playing at the gym?

Well this morning I encountered a fellow who absolutely did NOT feel self-conscious about his talent. Clad in an ankle length mink, some sharp jewelry and from my quick glance (I was self-conscious about his lack of self-consciousness) his sparkly studded eye wear, this man showed no lack of esteem.

At first notice, I heard, I processed, and I peeked. I assumed it was a simple ipod singalong casualty. At second glance, I discovered I was wrong. There was in fact no ipod. Just a cheerful snazzy dressed pimp tapping his toes on down 42nd street singing to whatever the sunshine, birds chirping, wind blowing inspired.

I sort of grunted, rolled my eyes, and tripped over the sewage disposal hose spewing out of chipotle and down the block.

Perhaps a lesson in self-conscious thinking. Perhaps.

I Love LISTS

.....and I love happy, so I was pretty please when I read this article in NYMag.

With apologies to Jay-Z, the current Empire State of Mind might not be something to brag about—at least according to the recent study ranking New York as the least-happy state in the nation. In the nation! Which seems, to us, rather unbelievable.

Yes, nearly half of the state’s residents live in a city that’s inordinately stressful (expensive, noisy, crowded, pushy). Yes, it’s hard to find a peaceful place to sip coffee, much less live. But on the flip side—everything else! Still, mired in the middle of January, you may need a little mood enhancement. What to do? On the following pages, you won’t find long-term, expensive fixes like therapy, pharmaceuticals, or a three-week jaunt to the Maldives. What you will find are quick, easy, and affordable ideas for feeling good in body and spirit, as well as bits of modern folk wisdom, some goofier than others, from a range of experts. So: Try a little self-administered acupressure. Eat an ounce of dark chocolate. Say yes to more sex. Break the silence in the elevator. Exercise. If a 3 a.m. ginseng soak isn’t your thing, keep reading. You’ve got 49 other chances to find your idea of bliss.Read more: 50 Steps to Simple Happiness

My favorites....

2. “Make your bed. Go figure, but outer order contributes to inner calm. Especially if you’re living in a small space—but even if you’re living in a gigantic loft. Start each day with a concrete, albeit tiny (and therefore manageable!), accomplishment.” —Gretchen Rubin, Author, The Happiness Project

15. Tone your midsection in transit. “When standing on the subway, knit your front ribs together and zip up an imaginary zipper as if you had on a very tight pair of jeans. Or when you’re in a cab, tighten an imaginary seat belt from hip bone to hip bone. You’ll end up with a strong midsection, toned abdominals, and a strong back and spine.” —Kristin Mcgee, Pilates and Yoga Instructor

32. “Carry yourself more erect. Poor posture is a self-fulfilling prophecy of gloom. You can improve your outlook and confidence simply by improving your posture.” —Eva Pelegrin, Founder, Attune Holistic Fitness

Love this

HANDBOOK 2010

I pretty much do all of these anyway, but for those of you slackers out there....here are some sure fire ways to ensure happiness in the new year.

Health:

1. Drink plenty of water.
2. Eat breakfast like a king, lunch like a prince and dinner like a beggar.
3. Eat more foods that grow on trees and plants and eat less food that is manufactured in plants.. 4. Live with the 3 E's -- Energy, Enthusiasm and Empathy
5. Pray.
6. Play more games.
7. Read more books than you did in 2009.
8. Sit in silence for at least 10 minutes each day.
9. Sleep for 7 hours.
10. Take a 10-30 minutes walk daily. And while you walk, smile.

Personality:
11. Don't compare your life to others. You have no idea what their journey is all about.
12. Don't have negative thoughts or things you cannot control. Instead invest your energy in the positive present moment.
13.. Don't over do. Keep your limits.
14. Don't take yourself so seriously. No one else does.
15. Don't waste your precious energy on gossip.
16. Dream more while you are awake
17. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.
18. Forget issues of the past. Don't remind your partner with His/her mistakes of the past. That will ruin your present happiness.
19. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone. Don't hate others.
20. Make peace with your past so it won't spoil the present.
21. No one is in charge of your happiness except you.
22. Realize that life is a school and you are here to learn. Problems are simply part of the curriculum that appear and fade away like algebra class but the lessons you learn will last a lifetime.
23. Smile and laugh more.
24. You don't have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.

Society:
25. Call your family often.
26. Each day give something good to others.
27. Forgive everyone for everything.
28. Spend time w/ people over the age of 70 & under the age of 6.
29. Try to make at least three people smile each day.
30. What other people think of you is none of your business.
31. Your job won't take care of you when you are sick. Your friends will. Stay in touch.

Life:
32. Do the right thing!
33. Get rid of anything that isn't useful, beautiful or joyful.
34. GOD heals everything.
35. However good or bad a situation is, it will change.
36. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.
37. The best is yet to come.
38. When you awake alive in the morning, thank GOD for it.
39. Your Inner most is always happy. So, be happy.

Friend Requests

(courtesy)

I would comfortably deem Live Your Life the Rihanna/T.I. collab, my favorite song of 2009. Obviously there were plenty of runner ups, what with kings of leon, friendly fires, florence and the machine, some black eyed peas jams, that miley song, and the ever lovely Taylor Swift. The obvious reasons being 1. I love T.I. 2. I love Rihanna, but also I think the song itself was just dirty, passionate, and really got your blood pumping.

Now that 2009 is behind us we can begin to look forward to the songs of 2010, and perhaps create some sort of game plan to ensure changes for the new year. Now many people are claiming this was the worst decade ever, closed by the worst year of all time blah blah. I don't really see it being that huge of a disaster. Sure, some bad things happened but I feel like most people will find something to complain about when looking back at any year, and something to strive for in the respective upcoming year.



For me, its all about creating networks. Using my friends for their strengths. Gathering proactively to somehow make this better for all of us to ensure that when we look back on 2010 we can say "Oh Yes! That was the most super best awesome year ever!"



Here's what I'm looking for....

1. Framer - someone who excells in framing pictures, paintings, artwork, etc. Bonus if they can build custom frames themselves.


2. Printer - I think this person will be relatively similar to #1 so perhaps when I find one, I'll ask for suggestions for the other. Someone who knows how to effectively print and display pictures that I find on the internet.


3. Tool Owner - This person could get MVP status if they have lots of space to use said tools. I'm talking chop saws, jig saws, table saws, all the fun things needed to create custom works of art (custom frames perhaps?!)


4. The Heir - A very prominent figure who has access to something. Doesn't matter who or what, only where. A large space. An interesting space. A space with tons of potential. They need to inherit it, or at least have means to attain it thriftly to save me some money.


5. Retail Superstar - That one important person who knows all the right people in all the right places and can get you clothes at wholesale instead of retail, employee discounts, and the holy grail... sale on sale.


6. The Financeer - Gotta have someone there to keep it all together, make sure I'm saving when I need to and spending when I can, and of course paying bills when they are due (eek!).


7. Chef - Loves cooking, hates eating. Makes it all for the rest of us.


8. The Music Guru - Hipper than all the rest of us put together, doesn't really work, and if they do its usually for some internet blog or website doing HTML code and fonts. Knows all the hippest hip tracks.


9. Technological Buff - If gigs were muscles and PPI were abs this guy would be the hottest on the block. Instead he just has all the fun gadgets and the biggest flattest TV on the market and he loves to show them off at "bitchin parties." (plays nicely with blockBUSTER the DVD master, who owns every DVD ever made or Mr. Youtube - knows all the hot vids to watch before they get taken down and remixed and tainted by millions of comments and home video versions).


10. The Entrepenuer - Everyday activities transformed into money making schemes just like putting them into a machine.....a machine this guy probably invented.

Honorable mentions : the pet owner with the cutest dogs ever, the celebutante wannabes who can "always get you on the list," the reservation guy who has always got one for this new club or restaurant, and the "oh no I've got a better way" guy who, no matter what the issue or topic, has always got an easier, cheaper, and all around better way to get it done.

New Year's Resolutions You Can Keep

Shaun showed me some tweeter posts this weekend that tickled me pink and I haven't really stopped laughing about them since. Obviously this time of year is cause for some reevaluation, new beginnings and all. However lofty goals tend to end up on the island of misfit dreams after plenty of people give up/lose sight/get lazy. So this year, why not try something new....Make some resolutions you'll be sure to keep.

1. Stop bringing your lunch, eat out more. We live in the cuisine capital of the world. An edible melting pot full of food options from the far regions of the globe. Why sell yourself short?
2. Sleep in later. I know what you're thinking...."how will I have enough time in the mornings if I sleep in longer?" To this I say, "Man up." You won't be bringing lunches anymore so that will save you at least 15 minutes.
3. (In accordance with resolution 2) Skip the showers. We are facing a global disaster, the more we waste the sooner we face impending doom. Save water, Go green. Sleep in longer too. ; )
4. Download more music illegally. Lets be honest, we are staring down the barrel of a gun and that gun's name is global recession. Even if you've surived cutbacks and layoffs, chances are you're still living beyond your means. Napster, where you at?
5. Spend more time drinking with your friends, less time working. If it hasn't happened yet we will all be pairing off soon and if you're anything like me, hangovers ain't getting any easier. Bottoms up! Cherish the moments that matter because soon they will be stolen by your children.
6. Eat more junk food. It tastes better. It fills you up more. Generally its cheaper.
7. Less time at the gym. For some of us these are our last years of looking good without really trying. We might as well take advantage. Plus the perspiration is bad for your complexion anyway.
8. Read less watch more. Our eyes will all eventually get bad, why speed up the process? Save yourself some wrinkles, and watch TV. (Note: the bigger TV the easier to watch so UPGRADE!)
9. Call in to work more. How many times have you finished the year with spare sick, personal or vacation days? Use them up. Will also help you spend more time drinking with friends.
10. Spend Frivolously. As I've previously mentioned we are at the pit of an economic recession, let's boost the economy, drain our savings, and start living life dangerously.
    

*This post is a product of my thoughts and efforts combined with some strangers tweets. I would totally credit sources if I could find them.

Why Are You Returning These Clothes?

Midway through last week I unveiled my newest blog featurette Thing's I've bought from H&M and never worn or Disposable Clothing and Me: The Forever 21 Story and today I thought I'd give you all episode number 2, that is of course if you can handle it.

Since my first post listed all the unimportant ways I wasted money, I thought today I'd go in a little different direction. This weekend I had a great brunchie date with Shaun and Ja'mie (weird name I know, but you'll get used to it). Trying to find a common ground lunchie spot in between Stuy-Town and Shaun's Murray Hill apt we wandered and wandered and played in the snow until we collectively decided that the only real restaurant in NY worth eating at is Blockheads. I don't really understand why, but Im sure I only eat there now. They have a spectacular brunch special involving all you can drink (top shelf hahaha) champagne and some mexican brunchie dishes (huevossssss rancherosssss). We ate and drank and drank and drank and sang and danced to Single Ladies on our bar stools and finally stumbled out after they ran out of champagne.

Our next stop was Shaun's work, where we ran into some friends of Ja'mie who also knew my coworkers, random random. Then we stopped at the holy grail of disposable clothing, the 5th avenue flagship h&m though I'm convinced all h&m's in this city are flagship, save that grossy one in SOHO that only has women's clothes.

Without trying clothes on I purchased an outfit, pants, shirt, sweater blah blah. As I went to the cash register I had a general question about the signs all over the store. "I'm sure these don't pertain directly to the clothing underneath, but is there any rhyme or reason to the $5 SALE $10 SALE $15 SALE signs posted all over the store?" "Well, there are clothes on SALE for $5 and $10 and $15, but the clothes near the signs aren't necessarily on sale for those prices." "Hm, okay thats what I thought. Just wanted to check...." "NO! Sir! I mean we have clothing on sale for those prices just not THOSE particular clothes! YOUR clothing is all on sale! JUST NOT FOR THOSE PRICES." "Right, right, no I get it. Thats sort of what I thought, and then when I just told you that's what I expected, I meant that I assumed correctly." ".....So....you want these clothes or not?"

After my brunch buzz turned into a brunch hangover, I just bought the clothes without trying them on knowing very well I would be returning the clothes the following day, after taking them home and realizing they don't fit me at all.

I was right. They fit as weirdly as $15 clothing should and so I headed to the Bryant Park location to return them after work. "Why are you returning these clothes sir?" "Honestly. I was really drunk when I bought them and I had no intention of actually keeping them, I just didn't feel like waiting in line to try them on."

STOLEN

I'm sorry but I saved this one, and can't remember where from. Love the evil Santa!

Design Work Life.

Leaving for Michigan tonight. Don't wait up for me.

Thats a Wrap

Holidays are here and we're bringing that cheer.

Turn me up Santa,

Let's go. One time.

Yo it's Christmas time, the holidays are here.

Bringing us joy and plenty of cheer.

Ring those bells, and trim yo trees,
Make sure you bundle up, else you bouta go an freeze.

Stuff ya stockings girl, and bake cookies (get em baked!)

Pull out the lace and decorate the place,

Roll up ya stockings, Speed up the pace (move faster!)

Santa's on his way, heavy packing in his sleigh (he got the gifts!)

Spreading cheer, with his dope reindeer,

Not one. Not two. He got about eight.

But he don't like waiting, so don't stay up late (get to bed!)

(Chorus)

Its Holiday time yall, and we're having a ball

Got the family all around and the snow is' a fall....iiiiiing

Down, all around. The holidays, they don't clown.

Just a one, special man here to bring the house down. down. down.

(Get it popping!)

We got one fat man, in a red suit (hot)

visting houses, up and down the block (block)

don't be scared, don't holler stop (stop)

hes spreading cheer, didnt bring the glock (glock nine)

all he wants to do is slam his christmas rhyme (its christmas time)

(Bridge)

Holidaaaaays.....and Santa don't play

Christmas Tiiiiiiiiime.......ya'll feeling fine

bring out the champ and the don,

we'll rock you all night long

you'll be singing this song

Till new years daaaaaaay.

(It's the holidays)

You say "Rap!" but I say "Wrap!"

I'll show you a present, you wont wanna give back

When Santa comes to town he's laying down the smack

Show him a fresh beat, and he'll show you a "wrap"

Wrap a present.!

With a pretty frilly bow.

This Christmas Eve, yo, It's gonna SNOW. (Snow. snow. snow)

(Chorus)

Its Holiday time yall, and we're having a ball

Got the family all around and the snow is' a fall....iiiiiing

Down, all around. The holidays, they don't clown.

Just a one, special man here to bring the house down. down. down.

(Repeat Chorus Till Fade)

Halfway Through the Week

Weekly, I hit a slump. At the bottom of that slump I dust the garbage off of myself, make a couple of jokes, and start clawing my way back to the top. This is not to imply that I in any way rest comfortably on the top normally. Well, whatever this is my blog I can say what I want. So anyway, I'm back on top and I think to myself what can I do to make my life more entertaining? How can I challenge myself once a week? What more can I do with my life?! Thus the birth of my newest blog feature Thing's I've bought from H&M and never worn or Disposable Clothing and Me: The Forever 21 Story.

I started taking a mental inventory of all the disposable clothing I've purchased from h&m in my lifetime, thinking "I need something cheap and something quick." Add all of that up, it's quite a sum. I would confidently say I've spent in the ballpark of a years salary on H&M clothing that has probably been worn once (some pieces never worn at all). I'm probably exaggerating just a teensy bit but the point is I've thrown a lot of money away on silly pieces of clothing. Which got me thinking about silly expenses. How much money do I spend on things that don't further my life, are not basic necessities, and in some cases aren't even put to use?

Until I can gaurauntee some sound evidence and clear facts I'll just base my findings on conjecture.

This week I've spent $9.50 on a brooch from H&M to wear to my work holiday party, for the sole purpose of making people laugh. - Arguably furthering my life if in fact amuses coworkers, in turn advancing my career. Could very easily turn into a wasted ten bucks on something impractical and all together embarrassing. - $9.50

$39.99 on a Crane Cool Duck Humidifier. I was in the market for a Vicks Vaporizer ($15 out the door at Walgreens) to help soothe a stuffy nose but I couldn't settle on an ugly, lumpy, appliance taking up space in my already too crowded bedroom. So I went for an alternate design, something a little more chic, with a little more personality. Yes, I realize I'm talking about an air purifier. All in all, the Duck, doesnt even soothe my scratchy throat, rather makes me shweaty in the mornings. - $25

I spent $2.25 on a subway ride, when I could have taken a chartered bus to work for $1 less. More space, less money, WITH cell phone reception. I opted for the subway so that I could spend a few more minutes changing shoes before work and not be late. - $1

$35.50 - waste so far this week and it's only Wednesday. WHERE TO GO FROM HERE?

Silly Boy Silly Banana Cell Phone

Remember around the dawn of the nokia age, when they had that skin peeling cell phone. A bunch of different color skins sold in packages of interchangeable looks and colors, one of them yellow. The yellow skin was "peeled" like a banana by a gigantic ape who accidentally got hold of the cell phone. Okay, okay I'm trying really hard to get this one to work but for today's installment of Do You Ever Feel Self Concious When Eating a Banana and Other Silly Ponderings I decided to re-report a news brief from this morning's issue of my favorite hotspot, some consider it the bible of press, of course I am talking about the one and only NY Post.

The clever devil title Oh, Boy! Cell bill hits 22G though not the best work I've seen done in the post was still nothing short of inspiring. I probably would have titled it Hell Phone Bill or Verizon, is Rising....to 22G! Anyway, enough wit onto the matter at hand.

A young son recently added to his father's cell phone bill downloaded 1.4 million kilobytes of data (uncovered by the current plan). When the bill arrived the father was expecting a little increase, with the added line and all but was horrorified when the bill read $21,917.00. All of which was credited back after an explanation. The son was removed from the plan. The dad did however, purchase an unlimited data plan for himself and daily asks his son for download suggestions. I'm making that part up, but the rest is true.

I do know from experience, I downloaded an application (google reader) and after using it for an entire month my mom was charged $150.00, that AT&T is very considerate of idiots using their plans as well. I believe my brother had a similar fiasco when he thought he signed up for a data plan but actually had not and downloaded lots and lots. Again credited back to us. Cell phones are a silly business. Made only sillier with a bloaded Luke Wilson advertising campaign. Keep alert and make sure to download only what you know you are approved for.

Bored at Work.Com

Holidays are always fun and its rare to catch me "bored" anywhere. However one thing doesnt change. Work, is boring every once and while and no matter how much holiday cheer you bring, how many crafts you look up, a lack of excitement is inevitably going to creep in. One week before I head home to the mitten to celebrate the holidays with my lovely family, I am stuck here in aggravating, and annoying NY and I am bored at work.com.

So I decided to bust out an old friend.

Remember when Eric Culps got a 7789?

Snow Day

Completely stole this entire post from Design Crush.

Ga Ga Ooh La La

Don't really know too much about her, nor do I really care but she looks good in our clothes and she can play the piano with her feet apparently. I also respect anyone who can garner such mockery simply by unapologetically doing whatever the hell she wants. Cheers to m'lady, gaga!

Silly Silly Silly

Do You Ever Feel Self-Conscious When Eating a Banana?

For today's episode of silliness I thought I'd share some things I never quite understood and probably never will.

1. Cigarettes in the morning. I guess because I've never been a smoker, never smoked before in my life, don't ever plan on it...I will never understand this phenomenon. It appears to be the utmost unappetizing ritual one could ever partake in.

2. Forever 21. Just never got it. Don't plan on it.

3. Diet Food. This one baffles me to my very core. Just cook food. Or eat healthy. Is diet food supposed to be a supplement for meals why not just cook meals and snack on fruits and vegetables. Everyone complains about the way diet food tastes anyway so I doubt they are eating it for the flavor. I guess I just don't get it.

4. Walking on a treadmill. Run or get off. Or go walk outside. I swear to you there are women on the treadmills at my gym who walk at a brisker pace leaving the gym then they do on the treadmill.

5. Snooze buttons. I feel that the people who use snooze buttons set their alarms earlier than planned for the sole purpose of being able to hit the snooze button for an extra ten minutes of sleep. Just plan on sleeping ten extra minutes, right? Or just get up!

Plenty more where that came from. I thought I'd skip the honorable mentions for today since most of them relate to the aforementioned (treadmills, smoking, diets etc).

Until next time, stay silly, eat your bananas.

Things are looking up....

MIDTOWN WEST—If you were trying to invent a story about the suburbanization of Manhattan, you couldn't come up with anything better than the sad tale of Arnold Hatters. The store, at 535 Eighth Avenue and 36th Street, survived three generations of family ownership before closing in June. "People need to eat," the final owner told Jeremiah's Vanishing New York. "So they're making do with last year's hat." Or they're spending their hat allowance on Slim Jims. Today, The Real Deal reports that the site's new tenant will be 7-Eleven. And that's just the beginning: The Slurpee-mongers plan to open 100 new stores in Manhattan over the next five years. [VNY; The Real Deal]

www.racked.com

And so it begins....

Though most of us are still digesting our Tofurkey (I really didn't eat any tofurkey) it's sort of incredible to think that the Holidays are upon us already. So much so in fact that I travel back to Michigan for Christmas in 21 days! The premature countdown sure made coming back to NY after a lovely relaxing Thanksgiving holiday much easier. I can't even begin to read all the blogs I've missed and I can't imagine catching up on all the writing I've missed out on. So instead I took the easy way out and picked lovely festive pictures. Deal with it.

Thanks Small Place Style for the festive pics!

Home for the Holiday!

Starting this evening I'll be home for the holidays. Away from my computer.

Have a lovely week! See you all on Monday.

Bored At Work.Com

One good thing about being Bored At Work.Com and being around a bunch of fabulous clothing is the ability to dress up and try things on.

Above, Melissa shows off some grungy knit panties and some frilly knit gloves.
Chilly Mackenzie shows how to keep warm, look like a teletubby, and stay stylish.

Getting dressed for a red carpet premiere is tough, as Melissa and I show you though, it doesn't always have to be. Here we push the envelope with some sensible faux fur.

boys who like girls who like girls who do boys

Cross dressing is so hot right now.

Thanks, NY Times.